Little worm

I got a little worm inside my tummy, that little worm is normally called by a baby but i found it funny to give it a nickname so worm was my first thought causse wel with 7 weeks it isnt a baby yet.
It was christmass when we decided that we wanted a baby,so i stopped with the birthcontrol.
Two days before my bf birthday i found out i was pragnent soo it was THE perfect gift to him, i can tell you i have never seen a men soo happy and confused at the same time hihihi
The first two weeks i was soo happy, i didnt stop smiling and telling everybody the news (a bit to early but hey....i was happy)
Now i am not that happy at al, my hormons are screaming...my god!, one moment i am feeling sick, the next al i can feel is angre and when that is passed i start to cry like a baby....for no f*cking reason...
A other reason is that before i got my little boy,two years before him, i was also pragnent off a little girl, sadly i lost her with 7 monts causse of thrombosis, becausse of that sickness is it hard for the little one to survive in my tummy, i need to take meds for it and then is the change of surviving 50%.
When i was pregnant of my little boy i was very affraid of loosing it and didnt enjoy the pragnency, i promised myself i will do that with this one...wel that is not gonna happen even tho i try soo hard, everyday i think abbout it....
Next week i am going for the first echo, i hope everything is okey and when i hear his or her heart i hope i feel a little bit better...